memoirs, art and fragments by Thomas Milner

Archive for March 5, 2012

Opiate Of The People

Towards the end of the 19th century (earth-time) a German Jew called Karl Marx, a political philosopher who was living in London, wrote Das Kapital which was to become one of the foundation stones of Communism.

In this book which was basically an attack on Capitalism, one of the many quotable aphorisms is: Religion is the Opiate of the People.


Now at the beginning of the 21st century might I suggest to your Excellencies that one change this to: Football is the Opiate of the People.

Football, in case anyone reading this is from another System in the Galaxy, is a game where twenty two grown men are paid mind-bogglingly huge sums of money to kick a a dead pig’s bladder around a field for ninety of their earth minutes.

I know, I know … go figure, there’s no accounting for taste, is there? But you will really fall out of your chairs when I inform your Excellencies that this, often unedifying spectacle of testosterone-fueled louts throwing tantrums when they lose, can be watched by up to a billion natives of this planet.

The inspection team is nearing completion of its assignment on this distant rock (there are just a couple of belief-systems we need to look at again in the eastern part of the planet) then we’re out of here!

Our recommendation is that the classification of this world should be downgraded from C (promising) to C- (disappointing).

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